by Ben Hess, Managing Director, ThirdPool Recruiting
Amy Cuddy’s research reveals that people want answers to two basic questions when they meet someone for the first time.
Can I trust you? | Can I respect you?
Cuddy refers to these dimensions as warmth and competence.
Both factors are important, but they must come in the right order to effectively establish a new relationship.
Warmth First, Competence Second
While competence is highly valued, it is evaluated only after trust is established.
And focusing too much on displaying your strength can backfire.
Without first establishing some trust, the second question can’t be appropriately addressed.
If someone you’re trying to influence doesn’t trust you, you’re not going to get very far; in fact, you might even elicit suspicion because you come across as manipulative.
A warm, trustworthy person who is also strong elicits admiration, but only after you’ve established trust does your strength become a gift rather than a threat.
Helping someone change careers and start a real estate business is a gift.
But, it can only be received if a candidate both trusts and respects you as a hiring manager.