In a post from the archive, Dave Mashburn describes the mindset of high-performing negotiators.
If you go into a negotiation believing the worst and expecting to be taken advantage of, you’re likely to be too aggressive and competitive. Your motive is to win the battle.
On the flip side, if you are overly concerned about offending, you’ll likely be passive and make too many concessions. This mindset produces poor results too.
What’s the alternative?
A mindset that assumes a positive outcome for both sides.
A positive expectation breeds trust and acceptance of the other party as a reasonable and rational person.
It creates a baseline of legitimacy of both party’s needs and minimizes the gamesmanship. The jockeying for the best maneuver to “win” is no longer the central goal.
The research on how much this mindset affects outcomes is remarkable.
In one political negotiation experiment (the most difficult type), it improved outcomes from 34% positive to 82% positive for both parties.
One caveat—this does not mean you just blindly trust the other person.
You should still retain the right to assess whether your opinions/beliefs are being considered and your expectations should remain high.
The right principles are always the eternal ones: Assume the best in people first and your success will improve.